Sunday, June 24, 2007

ramblings

looking back now, i never wrapped the year up.

i didn't wax eloquent about experiences or discoveries....
didn't reflect on life changing moments...

there are so many unique things about life in dubai that i don't realize until they pop up in one of my stories, things that have blended together so that they are simply part of my life now. and it's a life i'm excited to get back to - and that is the last affirmation that i made the right choice. i never really doubted, but it's nice to have that final reassurance in the simple fact that i miss it.

it's been good to be back in minnesota, to catch up with friends and family, rest and relax, watch truly crappy television and read some great books.

someone asked me once what the best thing about the year was. i don't think i can pick out a specific feature or event or memory to call the best, but what i can say is that the year brought me to a realization that i've set myself in a position to continue my life in this direction if i so desire - living abroad, traveling, moving when it feels like it's time... and at this stage in my life i love that.

is it perfect? no. because no matter where i choose to be, i have to sacrafice something. sometimes i miss my family, my friends. but i also feel that being away from them makes me appreciate the time i have with them even more. and because of the wonder of technology, i don't have to give up the people i love to experience the life i've decided to lead....


thomas wolfe said "you can't go home again."
makes me think... once you leave a place, is it still your home? can you have more than one 'home'?
dubai is my home. it's where i live my life, lay my head, drive my car, do my job.

but minnesota - maple grove, my parents' house - still feels like home. it's familiar. it contains my history. it's where i'm FROM... but is it home?

i lived in brussels for 10 months, but for those months i called it home - and my experiences there were so amazing that i'll always remember it, hold it dear. and when i went back this summer, it evoked such bittersweet feelings. despite some changes, it still felt the same...

I sat in my old apartment, walked familiar streets, shopped in the market and got the same lecture from the quiche guy on how to perfectly heat his product, ran on forest trails my feet still remember, saw the faces of children who are all so much taller...

it was home. it could be again. sounds cheesy, but part of my heart will always be there. it's where this whole adventure started.

i know the label isn't what's important. what's important are the memories.

but it still makes me wonder.